*NOTICE*
This blog is still undergoing construction thus some infos are empty.
But I do hope you like the layout Iceee!
-Your blog editor, Gellie :)
(*I LOVE it, Gellie! ^^ THANK YOU~! :D)
Yes, dear friends, I'm still filling it up. ^^ Thank you! :)
~Ice. :D
Wednesday, January 6, 2010, 10:27:00 PM
Oops, I took it again.
Different circumstances now. And the results are still accurate. (Refer to September 11, 2009 for the link. *And yes, I am aware of the implication of the said date.)
You are always alert and keenly observant. You are not truly satisfied with your everyday status and you are seeking fresh avenues which can give you the opportunity to prove your worth. You feel that there are still many barriers that stand between you and recognition - but one by one you will overcome them. Your tenacity is your one good point - like an English Bulldog, once you take the bite, you will seldom let go.
Always anxious to accept the role of the leader, as indeed you often work well with people - but try to stay out of the limelight. You'd like a life of ease with no one to rock the boat and someone who understands you is so important in your life.
You give the impression that you are a self-sufficient individual, pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain or pleasure. But this is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional person, one that may make hasty decisions and perhaps repent at leisure. It is time now perhaps to break the bond of detachment and become the real 'you' - the you that you would like to be.
It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.
Being afraid that you may be prevented from achieving your hopes and dreams is making you anxious and nervous. As a dreamer your ideas can at times move into the realm of fantasy and you could be following that so called illusive dream.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010, 6:10:00 PM
-_-'
I can't say that I was really looking forward to school again this year.
Hey, I know I haven't written for a while, but I shall. :D Next time. :P A lot has happened; I should start making some sort of documentary for that. LoL. I feel the need to finish many things today.
*breathes* Okay, 'looks like this isn't part of my to-do list. I'll leave it hanging for a while. (xD) :P
I will be focusing more on acads in the following days. But I shall write. :)
Thanks for existing, dear blog. ^^
<3, Peejay. :)
Wednesday, October 28, 2009, 9:24:00 AM
Mornings.
I've always said that I like nights better, because it's more silent, and it feels more infinite...in this secretly magical world.
But then, maybe that's just the more complicated side of me.
This morning, I woke up feeling greater than ever, as if I was in my best mood. Bright sun, good music (from my laptop), and fresh, cold air. It's been a long time since I woke up into an ambiance like this. It felt burden-free, and it was so light on my part. It was nice.
Then I started remembering everything from last night, from before. It's like it all seeped through to my head once more, and the black vibes entered. I remembered talking to a friend just the previous evening about his/her certain problems... And I remembered my 'Black Mood' these past days, as well as my extreme subconscious tantrum last night. I remembered the complications in life that made me sick: Love, anger, extreme emotions, convictions--Why can't life be simple? I thought of how possibly blessed a person with amnesia is. I mean, one who wakes up to a clear mind every morning. I thought of the main girl from the movie "50 First Dates". For some reason, she is lucky. Because she doesn't cradle any heartache in her heart, for she does not remember the painful memories that had occurred to her. Sure, her life may have been stolen from her, but is it really all that if she's going to be hurt throughout? I don't know with the character herself. It depends on the view, I guess. Maybe I'm being pessimistic. But I have to say, morning moments are probably the greatest. They're that moment when one could possibly forget everything--at least the sad or frustrating details--for a while, that peace would actually come into existence...even for a while. No butter-up, no flavorings...it's simply who you are. It's the real you. It's the honest face in you, free from all sufferings, all heartaches, all masks...because they do not exist in the plain essence of 'you'. So, try to grasp these mornings; you may not always have them.
I do not even know how I got this kind of morning. It seems so rare to me now. Not when I was a child, but now it is. There is so much to think of. I envy the little girl in me. Oh, where is she?
Well, I just hope that these mornings come more often. Do I? I don't know. My complicated mind is taking over me again.
Maybe. Please enlighten me.
~Ice.
Monday, October 26, 2009, 5:39:00 PM
Two steps back.
I wrote the things below last 5 August 2009 (W). I think I managed to finish it last 8 August (Sat). :) It's about my first few weeks in my new school. It was an adventure for me, and I took note of the significant things/people that I have encountered then. You just might have a special mention if I met you in this time span. I do not mean to offend or annoy or negatively affect anyone in any way. I'm just giving my honest point of view. But please do let me know if you find something inappropriate. Thanks! :D Many things have changed already since these first weeks, and the way I relate to people here may have already changed, but it's a way to look back at it all. It's been a good run. :) (For me, at least.) 'Hope you find it worth reading somehow. (My 'signature' would be included in what I wrote from before.) Enjoy! Here are a few highlights that I can manage to come up with. I’ll go way back, to the first day of classes, just to account for many things that I still remember. :)
15 June 2009 (M) – 1st day of classes. I met 2nd year students; Rona and R.R., my classmates in Botany and Religion class, are the first ones who tried introducing themselves to me. But the very first student I met is Belle, from Philippine Literature class. R.R. invited me to eat with her group after class. My sister and I argued about not meeting each other on time. (I’m in the same school with her now.)
16 June 2009 (T) – 2nd day. I met froshies; Biology lecture class, Chemistry lecture class, and Chemistry laboratory class were up for the day. Everyone was intimidated by me. *slight laugh*
17 June 2009 (W) – A freshman, Karla, invited me over to her dorm, and we got along pretty well; she’s very nice, bubbly, and accommodating. Apparently, her dorm mate is my classmate in Sociology and Anthropology. They saw me reading the Bible, and thought I was “too holy”. Everyone saw that I love reading; I think it’s mostly because I didn’t have anyone to talk to for the meantime.
18 June 2009 (Th) – A random girl who looks like she’s in 3rd year asked for my name, as I passed her by at the stairs. It’s like she knew me by face or something.
19 June 2009 (F) – No classes.
20 June 2009 (S) – I met more random people. It gives me a headache by trying to remember the names and faces of everyone I meet. While I was alone in the canteen, a guy approached and said, “Miss, can I have your number?” I was surprised. Of course, I casually asked his name first. He’s Willex (such a cool name). He looks like a punk-ish type of guy. I noticed that he had friends with him from a distance, so I motioned for them to come over so that I could meet them (also as a way to show that I’m only interested in making friends, or acquaintances). I met Edmar (another cool name) and Brian. I didn’t want to be a snob, so I wasn’t stingy with my number. (I limited my “accommodation” though.) That moment was flattering actually. My brother came home from his dorm near Ateneo. He bought an Atenean notebook for me; I missed him, really. First week was officially done. :)
*Basically, in the first week, I attracted WAY more attention than (un)wanted.
*More weeks passed through and I got stared at for quite some time; I met so many random people, and they seem nice, at the same time, a little too curious about me. I was focusing on my acads though, so I didn’t really mind. Sometime after the first week, we had an orientation for new students, and Kat, a new friend whom I met in Intro. to Med. class, accompanied me to McDo. I was extra thankful, because at first, I thought there was no place like such around school; I felt like an alien. My happiness was inexplicable then. Also, I met more girls that stayed in other rooms at Karla’s dorm, and we all got along. I usually stayed there during my excessively long breaks.
6 July 2009 (M) – God lead me to share with Bunny, a mature friend who was seeking something through her problems…and guess what! This day is her spiritual birthday! Praise God! God let me share about His love to Bunny, and let her accept Him, so now, she’s SAVED! :D I’m SO happy for her. ^^ It’s amazing, because she was the last person I thought I’d ever get to share with, but apparently, she was even the first actual one to hear it. :D Cool.
13 July 2009 (M) – I got a note from a secret admirer, placed inside my blue filecase.
16 July 2009 (Th) – I got another note from that secret admirer in the pocket of my bag. It was frustrating. Haha~
20 July 2009 (M) – No classes.
21-24 July 2009 (T-F) – I had my preliminary exams. Comparatively easy somehow, except for Botany. Religion was frustrating too; I thought I had an hour and a half, so I took my time elaborating on my answers. Apparently, it was only good for an hour. Okay, lesson learned. Anyway, furthermore, no one was able to touch my bag. :]
24 July 2009 (F) – Kat went with me to McDo for breakfast. ^^ A McDo cashier girl named “Mary Rose” asked for my number. At first I was confused at what “number” she was referring to; she meant my CELL phone number. Okay. Anyway, being nice to her, I just gave it. (Imagine how spread-out my number is by now. She apparently gave it to another guy there as well.)
25 July 2009 (S) – No classes for me again. The McDo employee guy texted me. His name is Butch. I was friendly, but I told him that I should know him first. I think he got the limits that I set. (See, this proves that you can push someone away a bit without hurting them, and still get your message across.)
2 August 2009 (Sun) – I saw a 3rd note from “my S.A.” in my other bag. (I change my bags every day.) It was placed there the day before. Apparently, the person is a student assistant from the library, the one who puts the bags in safe-keeping as students enter. (So THAT’s how the notes got into my bag. HOW could I have missed that?) The person left a number, so I tried sending a message. Later, I found out who it was. And what’s boggling was that it was a girl. I feel so stalked. But of course, I can’t be mean to her. I tried being nice by treating her as a lady alike. In that way, I’m setting limits, but I’m not pushing her in a way that would hurt her. We got along, and I’m hoping that all she really wants to be is friends, or else I’m going to have to be firm with her. (One of my concerns was that, being so much of a nerd, the library is practically my ‘home’; where else would I go…for studying? *cough*nerd*cough*nerd*ahem*)
*This weekend, my brother turned my already-normal-sleep-pattern into nocturnal mode again, by making me watch movies in his laptop all night. It really annoys me, because now, I’m suffering from an imbalanced schedule, missed time for studying, and a good night’s rest.
*I BLAME HIM. (Apologies. This was out of crankiness before. I love my brother much more than this level of annoyance.) For the rest of this week, I’m ever-so-lousy with my first class attendance. I seriously need to work on it. And this week, I couldn’t sleep by 10 pm as I used to do so when classes started, because my body clock got compatible with being nocturnal once again. DARN IT. I seriously blame my brother. I hate being pulled down. It’s not my thing to hate, but when you disturb me for your nonsense, I can hiss at you. REALLY.
3 August 2009 (M) – I stayed up from the previous night until the morning for this day, making crafty birthday gifts for Kat and Bunny. I managed to have classmates sign on them in the classroom without the two girls suspecting. It’s Kat’s birthday on 5 (W), and Bunny’s on 11 (T). It was easy to manage having the gifts signed with them in the same room; Kat is not much of the suspicious type, while Bunny thinks that the gift is only for Kat, so she thinks she’s “in” on it all. ;) We had reporting on Religion class. I very much like and commend Sir Willie’s new style of teaching. I enjoyed talking in front on my own, and making people laugh at times. I haven’t had the chance to do that in a while. Oh, yeah, I finally got to wear my uniform. :) White clothes with black leather shoes. Everyone seemed to have been looking out for that; I’ve always seemed to look like a fashion show in school everyday before, and they may have wanted to see me “blend in” down into “normal clothing”. :P Cool. :)
4 August 2009 (T) – It’s Gen’s 19th birthday. I could only do so much but greet her past midnight. She was up then. Also, I was finally able to actually publish in my new blog; I feel happy and fulfilled. ^^ (I hope it doesn’t become an obsession. :p) <-- And apparently, it didn’t. :P I lack the time. Haha. ----I stopped at this point, and left the following “reminiscing” to my lovely, dear blog. ^^---- It’s nice to look back at these days. I see how much change has occurred in my world here from beginning to present. Very cool, and I’m glad to have been able to really adjust more. (Plus, I’m HAPPY that people aren’t that curious about me anymore; I mean, they’re more used to me now. :P Haha.) I didn’t really expect certain details when I got here. I just thought of ‘making it up along the way’. It’s amazing. Many things have happened, more people have come in and out, and… It’s really fun. ;) You have no idea how contented I feel at this moment.
Transferring schools is really something.
It changes a person somehow. It gives a new life, a revival…a sparking opportunity.
And having ‘it’ as a secret from most people from my past university is quite the subtle adventure that I might need. (My special people, of course, know about me being gone already. :P I wonder how it’d be broken out to the rest.)
I love them—my crazy, endearing friends. Imma try to visit…soon, I hope. (But I can’t really promise.)
Gee, I used to be the ‘rapper R&B girl’ back there. Now, I’m like, Ms. Prim-and-Proper Lady over here. And it’s still me. Odd.
I feel bipolar. *laughs*
Oh well. It does depend on the people around me.
This ‘new school’ ordeal is still exciting to me. It’s like a giant leap. Mm. Thanks to all those who are part of it, both “past” and present. ^^ I hope you enjoyed reading. Do talk to me if you want to. =)
~Ice. :P
(If you’re stalking me, go ahead and keep track. Just know your limits. And, as nicely as I could say this, please... Get a reallife, please. Seriously. Love yourself. You can have your own stories too, you know. :) Don’t obsess over someone else's life. *well-meaning smile* ‘Hope we got that clear. Thanks. Have a meaningful, wonderful exploit. :D)
Monday, September 28, 2009, 12:00:00 AM
"You're really something. :)"
Aawww. *touched*
Thank you. ^^
(But...)
You know, I really don't get it, but people keep on telling me that I'm 'different'--in a good way. They look at me as if I'm someone extraordinary...which is odd, and quite humbling, really.
What. do they. see. in me?
Look, I'm just like everyone. Normal. *laughs*
A little weirder and clumsier than others... But nevertheless, normal. :P
Well.. Whoever I may appear to be, it's the result of other people's influence. They are the ones who turned me this way. They must be the pretty special ones. ^^
Hm.
It does do well for my self-esteem...so... Thank you. :D
You guys are simply wonderful. :)
^^
~Ice.
Friday, September 18, 2009, 11:41:00 PM
Good job, great job. :)
*gives self a 'pat on the back'*
Yay, darling, you managed to finally focus today. :) Keep it up!
I'll wake up later at 3 am (or earlier maybe) to note down all my research work. (*anxious*)
I'd like to finish it now, but when I fall asleep, I'd be on the major danger zone of waking up late. So, good...morning.
Hm.
Well, basically, I'm just happy to be goal-oriented once again after weeks of being muddled up. Oh wonderful grace. ^^
Then, when it's all over, I can continue reading John Grisham's "The Pelican Brief". (*sleepy*)
Mmm... Long way to go.. Much to do..
But, no matter. Along the way, I'll be doing my BEST, this time. :)
My last blog...sparked it for me. Thanks, dear. *puts head down on the pillow* Ahw, I'm talking to myself. Rmm.. LoL. I have to sleep now.
~Ice.
Thursday, September 17, 2009, 9:15:00 PM
Tomorrow, I want them done.
Competence.
The one word that's music to my ears.
I want focus and concentration in everything I do.
Everything = Important stuff.
Important = Seriousbusiness.
Serious business = I'm NOT here to act like a TEENAGER.
I hatedistractions, seriously.
Dilly-dally, out of focus. It makes me work less efficiently.
Being less efficient lets me fall below my standards.
Obviously, in turn, I hate falling below my standards, because, of all things, I'm not mediocre. (Play your kid games for all I care; just don't drag me in it.) I especially hate ending up 'average', because of petty reasons.
Honestly, if I were heartless enough, I won't have a social life.
Mmh, call me nerd, but I'd like to study, more than do many other "enjoyable" things.
I get great satisfaction from being the best. (Honestly, who wouldn't?)
...I'd probably even kill competing. *tries to laugh at sick humor*
(*Momentarily, I mean all of this, and I always would for the times that my serious side comes up. Later on, I'd probably feel guilty about saying these, and more often than not, it definitely wouldn't sound like me at all.)
This'd be my "Id" speaking,
The "Superego" is the one intervening, making me 'sweet' and 'friendly' to others. which isn't really what this entry's all about.
Don't get me wrong, it IS me--I think--the girl who smiles a lot and says hi to everyone, but there are times that people get very abusive about it, so, of course, a part of me resides as a balance.
This is the consequence of my nature.
Anyway, I do hope that the "Ego" leans more on the former. My mind screams for that, for the sake of all my pride and dignity. But yeah, I can't fully go anti-social, even if--sometimes--I really wanted to.
One Person that comes to mind every time I think of locking myself up in this 'world of competence'...
God.
He makes me remember why I've become a better person.
He reminds me that I have this desire to be a missionary.
He keeps telling me that it's "CHARACTER, not competence" that He looks at.
--But so often, in my kind of thinking, in the MIND that He gave me, it couldn't be helped. I desire to climb up.
It isn't bad. It isn't bad at all. But in the process, I must not push anyone away for my own ends. That's the thing. *sigh*
Oh dear God, what kind of person would I be without You?
Let me draw in.
Of course, since you have read this, I would just like to ask of you not to take me lightly as a person. Oh, don't be scared of me. *laughs a bit* This is just 'one of those moments'. ^^ Don't belittle me however.
To be honest, the only game I really play with people is "play nice". But sometimes, when aggravated, being "nice" almost feels like an obligation to me as a Christian. Of course, it's no show! My nice side comes naturally most of the time. =)
Basically, I'm just not pleased with how some people tend to hold me back (or even think of me as weak just because I seem innocent), but, being polite on its own, I do not hiss at them. (Dear God, what great difference You make in me.)
Nevertheless...as you have seen part of what truly goes on in my mind, I'll leave you with this:
Just be careful with crossing the lines with me. (It goes for any aspect.) I will can seriously...chew heads off.
~Ice.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009, 9:04:00 PM
Tears of joy.
CRYBABY. :D
For the first time in a number of months, we talked again.
Yes, my 'former' best friend and I, who drifted apart due to a great misunderstanding.
Earlier this night, I had a random outburst of innocent honesty, that I typed a message in my phone for him.
"_, I miss you! ^u^ So much! Wala lang. :D ~Pj."
(*"Wala lang." means 'No particular reason.', literally translating to "Nothing only." It's kind of my favorite Filipino line. :P)
With no care with any other past event that had occurred, I mentioned that I missed him.
I did.
I so badly did.
His number was not saved in my phone, because--as a bad 'care-taker' of phones--I kept getting a new one. But I still knew his number by heart and by mind. (Wow, dramatic line. Disregard. Haha.) And, knowing him, he probably still has that same number until now.
:)
Still... Needing reassurance, I texted a really good--no, GREAT--friend of mine, confirming if the number was correct. She replied yes. ("Yeppers", actually. :P) No further questions. She knew my purpose. (Of course, why else would I ever ask about it, of all topics?) No matter, I trust (and very much admire) Karen Q. more than anyone else. Seriously. She may not even know. :)
So...well, I typed the number in, and patiently watched as my homesick message got sent to the number that I haven't even saved yet.
Message sent.
I smiled. And for some reason, I was assured that the recipient would be absolutely happy to get that message.
I half-thought, Now, all I have to do is wait.
But really, I didn't care about whether I get a reply or not.
Point is, it's sent. :)
A few minutes later, my phone vibrated.
*anxiety*
"Buzz!!
Lol. Havent heard from u for a while eh? (or should i say, u havent heard from me 4 a while) lol. Wazzup?"
I CRIED.
I couldn't help it. I CRIED.
I haven't received a message which gave me that kind of feel for a LONG time. As in a LONG TIME.
I felt like I was talking to the person closest to my heart again.
For a year, we had a barrier, and for some months, our existence almost never even brushed against each other.
But this time, it was something peaceful again. It was different. This message was something like the ones I get from my dearest friendtwo years ago.
As quickly as my fingers and composure could, I typed a response to this ever-so-treasured reply.
I hastily mentioned that I already transferred and that I'm currently taking up BS Medical Technology, as if I felt that I could tell him anything once again.
Then I stopped, looked at what I wrote, and erased those parts, because I knew that it may be too much to swallow in one seating. He may have thought of it already, just waiting for me to confirm, but still. He doesn't have to know about it right now. Not right now.
I simply focused on his side of the story. :)
"*cries* I MISSED you!! *hugs* How was Mod.?? I hear you're doing great! :D Congratulations!! ^u^ Oh my goodness! You're like a long-lost friend! Haha. :D"
I didn't call him "Block genius" as I used to/would have. It doesn't sound like me to tag him like that now. Times change? 'Grew up? Different view? I don't really know. I just knew that it's one thing I won't mention/use for him anymore, especially in that message.
Once more, I crybecause of him.
But this time, it was the kind that I terribly embrace. This must be the most wonderful set of tears that I have ever shed.
And really, this was one of the most tear-jerking moments that I ever had.
My best friend. To me, he's still that beloved friend that I've always loved.
I cried, as if someone died. *laughs* I couldn't help it. :P
"Yeah, yeah, i know. Haha. Wel, thank god, i did well, not that im braggng, but just thankful. And sorry 4 d late reply, just ate dinner. Class til 730 kasi.:|"
I smiled.
I took notice that he said 'sorry for the late reply'. He's somewhat being careful not to make me feel neglected. :) Aaw.
Same old B. ^^
Awkwardly enough, it was actually me who took time to reply. My parents arrived home, and I went to meet them. Of course, I had to fix myself first from the I-just-cried-my-eyes-off look. :P
After a while, I managed to send a 3-page reply, which also concluded that inexplicably wonderful 'catching-up':
"Aww, mahn. Ahaha. No prob. =) Dinner is vital; it's been a long day.ö :p Wow, yeah, praise God. Ü Ang galiiing! ^u^ Go, _! Ü :D I was saddened for the others, but they'll get a much better turn, definitely. Ü I'm especially amazed with the "survivors". :P Hardcore! Haha. Anyway, you should go back to what you're doing. Thank you, THANK YOU, for the time. Ü I'm just super happy to hear from you. Ü Keep on doing well, dear friend. :D God bless you!!"
And so, conversation closed. :)
Ending the conversation myself made me realize how much I've grown up, learning to 'let go' and be mature enough to give him space and freedom, even though I would have loved to talk to him more right then. 1) I am aware that he is already taking up Mod., which is very tiring and requires much of his time and energy for studying; 2) I respect that people should be given their own chance and right to decide; and 3) I believe that I am independent enough as a capable, talented, self-esteemed lady who will not over-attach herself to others. :) ^^
Basically, I didn't want to take too much of his time. Besides, honestly, I really couldn't ask for any more blessings this day--or this week for that matter--than that.
*smiles*
...
*doesn't know what else to say*
Thank You, Lord. =)
I am TRULYgrateful.
:)
~Ice.
..or..
Peejay. :)
Saturday, September 12, 2009, 10:54:00 PM
Spender-ella
Today, I went to Pavilion mall to buy 3 things:Pens (I keep losing mine. :c ), tissue (My colds. *sniffles*), and medicine (Again, for my colds.).
I ended up buying the following: (*from National Bookstore) - 3 Pens (2 M&G black, 1 My Gel) = P 35.75 (The M&G pens are inexpensive AND yet, great in quality.) - Filipino-English dictionary (*laughs* I know right? It's about time I practiced my Filipino vocabulary.) = 52.00 (I bought a small one. :P Discounted from P65. NB promo, yay!) - Mechanical pencil = 25.75 (Relatively cheap; after all, I'll probably lose this one, again.) - Sketching pencil (Staedtler, 7B. I love dark shadings. :) ) = 27.50 - Teen devotional (thrive.teen.devotional) = 230.00 Sub-total: P 371.00 (I deliberately bought the other things to avoid centavo amounts. I wanted every peso to be accounted for in my LN card.) (*from Mercury Drug) - Medicine (10 pcs. :p) = 41.50 (2nd sub-total) (*from the main store where MD was located) - Small alcohol (I particularly prefer the scent of the brand 'Cleene'. ^^) = 13.50 - Tissue (Finally. :P) = 28.00 3rd sub-total: 41.50 Total: P 454.00
Ooohh.
I was going to buy my ownstethoscope and strap for BP-reading, which would both cost either P500 (in Mercury Drug) or P650 (in National Bookstore, which I preferred more because of the card), but I was in no hurry to have them with me. Instead, I plan to buy them on Wednesday, maybe.
Oh, and, not to forget: Earlier, I was walking in the mall, towards the escalator, when I happened to pass by the Dunkin' Donuts booth. I didn't even look at it because, of course, I have no business with food today (Still fasting. ^^). But I smelled COFFEE. Coffeee~! ^u^ (Hahaha.) I walked back (LOL.), and asked the girl at the counter if there's coffee. She said yes (Yes! :D), and so, I ordered some. :P Additional P27. Anyway, aside from the point, I stayed at a table for a while and noticed two diners sitting beside me who seemed to be...Christians, if I'm not mistaken. (It's nice. *smiles*) I started reading the introduction in the devotional, and I intend to really start reading it when I get home (I prefer having fellowship with God alone, or with a Christian sibling.), and I silently prayed, thanking GOD for this wonderful devotional, and hoping to come closer to Him through this. ^^
Anyway, total is: P481.00 :)
Ah, yeah, I also bought water from the canteen. P10.
Thus, grand total for this day (so far) is: P491.00 ^u^ (P9 shy of P500. :p)
Now, to prepare today's financial statements... (Hahahaha!)
Mm, no, Accounting. I'm done with you. *laughs* :P
Perhaps.. Relating this to Medicine...
*blank*
--AS I WAS SAYING (:P), since I already have a Filipino-English dictionary, I shall be posting Filipino 'WORD OF THE DAY's from now on (or 'word for the entry', at least, since I probably won't be posting everyday). Then, for every 7th posts, I'll be writing a Filipino pangungusap/talata (sentence/paragraph - Yes, I'll make good effort.) applying all those 7 words that I've encountered. Alright? :)
Why 7? They say it's GOD's number. ^^
To be fair, I won't be taking words from the English side, since that would be quite biased. (Some Filipino translations are just different spellings of the English word.) I'll be taking them straight from the Filipino part. And I'll be taking words that I'm not that familiar with.
So, yeah. I'll start now. :)
1. Ningas: n. blaze; flame
(Sentence to be given next time. ^^)
Good.
By the way, random thought: I'm hungry! :))
Well, fasting usually does that to a person. :P
But you know what, PRAISE GOD! Who knew I could go on for 5 days without physical torment? :)
I wasn't starving, and it surprised me, really. To think that I'm exposed to a home that usually has really...good...food... on the table. :P I honestly can't believe that I haven't eaten for almost 5 days! Wow, God, AMAZING. ^^ YOU are AMAZING. :D
*Today, I found out that Val Ochavo from Caduceus is a born-again Christian. YAY! ^u^
(And another random thought: I still owe Mae a drawing of a donkey. Haha. She's Val's best friend, and Val loves donkeys--I think...so...yeah. That's why I remembered. :P)
Hm.
I also want to post what I learn from God, especially from the daily devotions that I'll be having, so I'll PRAY for GREAT MOTIVATION from GOD! :D Praise God! ^^
What else?
Ahw, I missa lot of people. Really. I hope to catch up with them sometime soon. ^^ :)
OHH YAH. Two things that I'm saving for, before November (or even October) hits me: 1. Green contacts 2. Hair straightening
:)
My friend Joyce says that I might be able to pull off the green eyes. (Not literally!) Haha. Aaw, thank you. ^^ *hugs!* I miss you!
Mum says I'm going to have braces sometime. I don't know when 'sometime' is, but I do know that I can't enjoy a LOT of my favorite delicacies when 'sometime' comes. So, I must enjoy them NOW. Haha~
Tomorrow, I shall be buying the new perfume that I discovered last Sunday. P175. Quite cheap for a good scent. :) (No, I'm NOT bragging, if that's what you think. :c I'm just saying what's on my mind.)
I haven't really splurged for a while. It's RARE that I really spend, OKAY? Plus, not eating saved me a lot. (LoL, that didn't sound quite right.)
OH.
Next week, on Wednesday, I'll be treating a new friend to Pancake House. (Banana Pancake, HI!!!)
And, hopefully, on Friday, all Caduceus apprentices will have lunch together. Venue is still undecided for now. :) (I'm secretly hoping for Yellow cab. Haha. Okay, now it's not really a secret. :p If I save enough money for next week, I'll surprise them with a treat there. ^^ IF. Haha.)
:D
..
You know what, I should be studying right now. :P
Cheers!
~Ice.
- entry finished at around 0200 pm in the CNO office -
8:30:00 PM
One week.
*The week after my midterm exams. :)
6 September 2009, Sunday
* Church - Sermon : Characteristics of a Christian who was Healed: 1. Has a drastic CHANGE in life (*From spiritual blindness to seeing) 2. Has something to SAY about Jesus (*Uncontained amazement) 3. BELIEVES and WORSHIPS Jesus (*A life for JESUS) * Family lunch @ Sbarro - Cheers for my 22-year-old sister - I heart theZitti. :P :)
7 September 2009, Monday
* No classes, due to a certain special burial (?) * Strong rain = snuggle up in bed, BUT a bonus of colds from the sudden change in temperature * Tried to do research, but ended up not really achieving much *laughs*
8 September 2009, Tuesday
* First day of the term's finals section * My first day of fasting (from 8-12) - Reasons: 1) Stronger faith; and 2) SPIRITUAL MOVEMENT in my new school - No solid food for five days * Hang-out with a new friend * 'Judgment day' for my close friends: Result - Heart-breaker (for many), but still, FAITH in GOD! ** By God's grace, I didn't feel hungry, in opposition to what I expected. The Lord is my strength! :D
9 September 2009, Wednesday
* A very cold and rainy day * Phone got left behind at home (Oh my.) * Miserable with COLDS ("It is the little things that are impossible to ignore.") * Frog murder :(--I mean, dissection, in Biology class * Left my dissecting materials in my Socio-Anthro classroom (I was told to look for it in the 2nd floor, janitor's place, and...) * A horrid smell was filling the back hallways (I had to cover my mouth and stop breathing to keep myself from hurling! I RAN AWAY to OPEN AIR. I think it's of the dead bodies. I decided that all my stuff there--the dissecting kit, lab gown, lab maskS, lab gloveS, and clean rags--were not worth it, and I'd rather just buy them all again. But of course, I knew the value of money used to buy those--not to mention that it's terribly hassling for me to buy--so I opted to just come back for them another day.) * Started working on the Caduceus desk design with Liza, a fellow artist apprentice * Absolutely needed tons of sleep ** It is quite a fond thing that God blesses me with nice people who are concerned with me when I fall asleep in jeepneys that I ride going home. :)
10 September 2009, Thursday
* No classes (for me, at least) * 'Founder's Day' for our school * Super strong rain * Did nothing important (*frowns*)--Oh! OF COURSE, ASIDE FROM... * Call ATE ALPS, my DISCIPLER!!! :D :D (I am VERY happy to hear from you again! I REALLY MISS YOU! *sobs* I cried. :p)
11 September 2009, Friday (The memory of the 9/11 incident..)
* Very sick and dizzy/sleepy in class * Got my dissecting things back (Yay!) * Bag's terribly heavy today (and I don't really know why) = Today, I HATED walking up the stairs. An empty stomach MAGNIFIES the gravity ten-fold, and weakens its owner altogether. * Got pinched on the cheek by someone UNAUTHORIZED :| (Haha. :P) * Slept for most of the time that I was home (I didn't even get to drink the coffee that I asked for. :c Aww. Oh well.)
12 September 2009, Saturday (*Refer to the next blog.)
* LAST DAY OF FASTING (I do think I might want to extend though. I'd like to spend more time with God, really. At the same time, you have no idea how much I'm craving for food already.) * Bought a lot of stuff (and I'm happy :) ) * Just found out that our Filipino class has been moved from the schedule of 0700 pm - 0830 pm to the time-slot 0530 pm - 0700 pm (Well, okay. But, yay! Earlier dismissal. ^^) * Went online and got struck by the downed situation of a friend; serious talk after ** Anticipating a whole new, fresh week tomorrow :D
*You know, I just might use this for Filipino class. :) We have a project that involves a one-week journal. Of course, I'll have to write it in paragraphs, and I have to translate it in Fil. Hmm.. Help please? :p
~Ice.
12:22:00 AM
Traumatic Goodbye.
Why me?
This is the horror of all horrors, simply murderous! You can just imagine how much I think I'm hallucinating right now. I feel sick and uncontrollably scared at the same time.
WHY should I be the one to witness all this monstrosity towards the reality that I know? I would say that I would rather be one of them right now, rather than have this terrible sight linger in my mind... But I wish for neither, for they must be going through extreme pain themselves right now.
Oh, my cursed life.
My brethren! I MOURN for you! Oh, why, why, why is this being done? MONSTERS! This is pure evil!
Why, I am sealed in this glass compartment, and I see all my brothers and sisters, some of whom I may know, being tortured with the worst of the worst.
I wonder why I am reserved in here. Will something else happen to me? What fate will I fall unto?
Oh, horrid. HORRID, I say!
Look at the pain in their faces, as they are being...SKINNED alive! OH I CAN'T BEAR THIS MADNESS!! I don't know what to do! I'm locked up in here! These monsters!! AHH!! MONSTERS.
This is not happening. This is just a dream, just a horrible nightmare. This is just a horrible, horrible nightmare.
I can see the guts of my own kind, their blood spilling out! AAAGH! YOU WICKED--THINGS!!! MONSTERS!! MONSTERS!!!
...
..
I am going to die.
...
Fear... Frustration... Brutality...
Why should it end like this?
The pain is bestowed upon me even before I experience it. This is the ultimate monstrosity!
I mourn... I MOURN... Oh, how I would like to kill right now.
--Huh? What is this? ..A new face?
It is looking at me.
It is glaring at me.
OH IT KNOWS THAT I AM STILL ALIVE! And it's going to KILL ME! This is the ONE that is going to KILL ME!!
Look!
It is taking out the same things that the other killers did, before they laid their...filthy, hateful hands upon my helpless siblings!
Look! Look!
...I'm next.
I'M NEXT.
I'M NEXT!!! NO!! NO!!! NO!!!! YOU CAN NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!! NO!! BACK OFF!! STAY AWAY FROM ME!!
Help! HELP! PLEASE, HELP.
HELP--Ugh! What is this? This is not my home. This is not the water that I dwell in... Maybe they think I like it in...this...dirty hole...
Eugh...
...
'Makes...
...me...
...drowsy...
..What..is...
...
No. I must...fight on... Get out..must...
...'Pushed back in.
'Mouth is...forced open. They'll cut my tongue.. No... Must show...that...fight..
...
Help..me...
..
Ahh...taken out...finally. I...sick...there.....
--Ohhh, water... Good.. Giving me...water...
Can't...move...
Half aware..I am carried away...somewhere... Placed on...hard surface....
You are the sort of person that needs a peaceful environment. You seek release from stress and freedom from conflicts and disagreements, of which you seem to have had more than your fair share. But you are taking pains to control the situation by proceeding cautiously and you are right in doing so as you are a very sensitive person.
In actual fact you are not willing to exert yourself in any way. You have that truly 'laid back' attitude and are unwilling to extend yourself or exert undue effort. You feel that to move forward - be it in your life style or in business relationships - would require more energy output than you are prepared to give at this time. You want to take life easy and your attitude is such that 'Enough is Enough'.
Many people will consider you egotistical and full of your own self importance. On the surface you could well give this impression and perhaps the reason for this complacent attitude is because at times you indeed have that 'short fuse' and are quick to take offence.
Setback after setback has resulted in considerable stress and now you have got to the stage where you are continuously on your guard, not only to protect yourself from others but to protect yourself from yourself. It would seem that many of your unfulfilled hopes and dreams have led to uncertainty and suspicion. You no longer wish to answer to others and you are insisting on freedom of thought. You feel that you are fully self-sufficient and can control your own destiny. You are seeking ways to protect yourself from further loss of prestige and against further setbacks. You have become very dependent and you doubt that matters could possibly get any better in the immediate future and this negative attitude is leading you to exaggerate your claims and to refuse reasonable compromise.
You wish to be left in peace... no more conflict and no more differences of opinion. In fact you just don't want to be involved in arguments of any shape or form. All you want is for 'them' to get on with it - and to leave you alone.
Evaluation: Pretty accurate. :)
If you try it out, do let me know what comes up. I'd like to hear from you. ^^ Thanks. :D
~Ice.
Monday, September 7, 2009, 7:35:00 PM
Obsessed. *laughs*
I saw this game in Kuya Luigi's Friendster profile, while I was giving him a comment. I tried it, and for some reason, I found it addicting. I think I've gone overboard. Too drawn by the game's challenge, I lost it. :P I feel like a kid, wanting to get the best out of this cute little game. But nevertheless, it annoys me to not get as far as I want. So far, I've only reached up to Level 12. So far. *laughs*
Enjoy. ^^
~Ice.
P.S. As for Kuya Gigi, I don't know if I'll thank you or not for this, but definitely, you're meaaaan!! :)) :P Thanks. :P
Saturday, August 29, 2009, 10:43:00 PM
Mmh.
Dear diary,
Today, I accidentally fell off a jeepney. I just got home, and I haven't removed my sweater yet. I think my elbow is either bleeding or badly wounded. At least I stood up gracefully from the hard cement. Haha.
~P.
That was just my ym status tonight.
You know what, if I could only blog as concisely as that, I might be happy. :) But then, I won't be fully satisfied, because there was more to this day than that. Of course, I won't go into ALL the details. :P
Let me get to the major highlights: 1. In Intro. to Med., we had bloodtyping. I'm seriously getting used to having pointy stuff getting pricked into my flesh, stealing my blood, now leaving me almost completely indifferent about it.(I used to be scared of losing even the tiniest droplet of my own blood.) *I'll get onto the steps next time. =) (Ugh, procrastination. No really, I don't want to make this blog long.--Well, not twice as long at least.) *Some classmates were still nervous. Maybe my nervous (no pun intended; I was going for the senses) system isn't functioning normally. Haha.
This is my hand. That's my ring finger with blood coming from the pricked spot. Nymia handled my blood. (Sadistic girl, she is. *laughs* :p)
I handled Lara's blood. Her blood type's A, according to the results in the typing sera. :) My blood smear sample wasn't perfect, at all.
2. I had my report in Filipino class. It felt great! I love reporting, because I have the ability to have fun with it. Work with play. :) *Everyone was really attentive, because my effort to speak in straight Filipino (the EFFORT, not the full success) amused them. (I have the "reputation" as an English-speaker.) They congratulated me after. It's great. *laughs a bit*
3. I fell off a jeepney. Clumsy! *I actually find it kind of funny. :p *laughs* (Crazy.) *People got shocked when they saw me slam on middle of the concrete road. All I saw was the ground. *I didn't feel much pain (thank you, needle experiences), so I stood up as if I got off the vehicle the proper way, with all my dignity kept in tact. My elbow stings now, and it did get injured. My right lower arm is experiencing a bit of shock right now. My fingers are still fully functional though, so I got to chat with a couple of concerned friends.
4. I plan to really study tomorrow. My family plans to go to Subic, but I'll pass. I have exams next week, and I WANT those high grades.
More stuff that has been going on:
- My Christian life, first and foremost. I have been having great struggles with keeping my fellowship with God these days, but He is ALWAYS faithful. :) Also, I very much miss Paula, my most wonderful sister in Christ. Even if we do not get to talk now, her enthusiasm for God still really helps fire up my faith. (Dear God, help me. You are my strength! :D)
- I've been so stressed these past days, that I have been used to drinking coffeeto keep me up and energized. *I've been a group leader in some classes, and I have a very, very bad habit of being too much of a perfectionist, that I take all the load from my groupmates and spoon-feed them, to make sure that the "group" output reaches my standards. I HAVE to LEARN to adjust and accept that NOT EVERYTHING is PERFECT. *sighs* *That exaggerated leader-servant action is paired up with my wonderfully stressful individual work as well, so... Imagine. :| *laughs at myself*
- God has used me to help some Christian siblings, and vice versa. ^^ He talks to us through each other. :) Wow. God, You are awesome! Amazing! :D
- Late news, but: I have been part of Caduceus, my new school's official publication, for more than two weeks now. *By God's grace, I would be able to fulfill my purpose on why GOD has placed me here. :D (THANK YOU, GOD~! ^u^) I know that He wants to use me to touch other people through this. *There WAS a short draft blog here about my excitement on when I was officially dubbed member of that org. There's a long story to it, but bottom line is that I'm IN. :D I'll just scratch it off now, 'cause it would just be draggy. (Or I'll just make it a quick post for the sake of my expression then.) The date of that draft was 14 August 2009, for record's sake. *I actually thought I didn't make it. You should have seen my reaction when I saw on their bulletin board that I was being called for an interview! :D :) - Speaking of Caduceus, last Saturday, 22 August, we covered for the Nursing Freshmen Acquaintance Party. Theme: Hollywood. I LOVED it. :) ^^
*Photo taken by PJ Santos (Thank you! ^^) (I did feel like a professional news person in what I wore. *slight smile*)
*Stolen shot by Jessant Deblois *Note to self: Never have a make-up retouch around guys. (Haha. :p But it's a nice shot too. Thank you, Sant. ^^ I commend that. *smiles*)
- I have a Christian prof, Sir Vic, who wants to encourage his Christian students by holding weekly Bible studies! Praise GOD for him and his life. :)
- Not to brag, but, I notice that I get more admirers in school (despite the passing time, wherein my face gets more familiar). Flattering. =)
- I've just come to realize...that I am mostly a "teacher's pet". Really. Mm..
- (Oh, and yeah...) People from my former school have been wondering why they don't see me anymore. Some even interrogated me through ym. :p It's hard, because while I don't want to let them know that I'm gone (It's my personal right.), I don't want to lie to them either; I've been very careful and general with my answers. Only a few, very trusted friends know what happened to me. :)
*So far, evaluation of my blog... :) I'm contented. I'll end the updates here. :)
--Wait, last... Ate Alps! My dear 'ate' (older sister) and discipler! I miss you! I'm happy for you, and I have prayed for the movement in Davao. I want to tell you so many things, so I hope I get to put them all together in one piece. :P C= Praise GOD for your life! ^u^ My heart is with God, and I just pray for a stronger fellowship with Him! =) I'll talk to you more when I can. :D I MISS YOU! ^^ I MISS Bible studies and sharing with you! I hope to see you again. c= But wherever God leads us, let us FOLLOW. ^^ =D Take care, Ate Alps!! Mwah! c=Your disciple,
Princess. ^^
:D There. I'm happy with my blog. =)
You know, really, I've always wanted to say this apart from inside my head: It's irking how I have a lot to say, yet I get to write ever-so-rarely. Really, I have tons of DRAFTS in this blog already. I have to get to them soon (and probably revise them to as short as I can manage and be pleased with).
I will. I WILL. :)
This is God's day. ^^ (Lord, please help me get through the next, the way You want me to. Please. *smiles* Thank you. ^^)
~Ice.
Friday, August 14, 2009, 5:18:00 PM
I'm IN!!!
I MADE IT.
I'm IN. *big smiles*
(This blog was "finalized"/completed and posted after the 29 August post, but started and saved last 14 August 2009.)
*I was absolutely excited as they (people from Caduceus, the school's official publication) interviewed me, and I was simply almost sure that I'd get in at that moment! Would they bother interviewing me--or anyone, really--if they don't intend on letting me in? *At first, I thought I didn't make it, because no one contacted me regarding the interview; it was only from another applicant that I heard that the interview already went on. *It broke my heart, but I learned to accept that maybe God didn't want me in (for now, at least). I still kept looking at their bulletin board every time I passed by though. *One evening, while waiting for my night class, my classmate and I passed by, and she pointed at the board, where I saw MY NAME sealed behind the thick glass, and I practically JUMPED and "screamed" from excitement. (See? My name's there! :D :D)
It just so happened that they didn't know my number, but I actually had the highest score among the artists. :P Yay! :D *I applied for an artist, but I'm probably going to be all-around, 'cause they know that I'm able. :)
THANK YOU, LORD. ^u^ *all smiles*
I'm in. :D
PRAISE GOD!
There's a reason for this. :) I hope I do it for Him. =)
THANK YOU, CADUCEUS. ^^
:D
~Ice.
PROFILE
I'm Princess; they call me "Ice". Some say I'm weird, some say I'm nice.
I tend to be silent, yet I am sweet. Innocent, but I can handle the heat.
:)
I'm a born again Christian, that's what matters. :)
I have an intro in my first blog, so if you want, do browse now. ^^
I am sleepy at the moment, so I'll get back to this next time.
*Thank you, Gellie~! :D You're the best~ I loooveee you! ^^ :*
